Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Blizzard...

When I mention this word I am thinking this; my wife pic #2 and my brother pic #3




#2

#3



We are all right but due to the current blizzard in Logan and Sardine Canyon I don’t know what my boys are thinking. I hate weather.

I’m doing my PhD at Florida State.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Is God really there?








This thought comes to all of us at one time or another. We wonder if there is a higher being watching out for us. For me that Being is my Heavenly Father. I know He is there and let me tell you why.

Parenthood sucks. To be a good parent means that you have to give up a lot for your children with no thanks.
"Dad can I use the Xbox now?" "Geez Dad when will you get off the TV." Can we go skiing?"
Note I love gaming, tv especially during football season and hate skiing or cold (see last blog) yet with the exception of the skiing I tend to let my children play on the computer or TV. It also means a lack of sleep while holding a sick child while he vomits all over you or cries inconsolably at 2:30 am.

To get back to the point I've come to understand my Father during my newest son's (10 weeks)past few nights. See we are trying to get him to fall asleep on his own. He'll crash if we hold him but that could be awkward at 16 so we want him to learn to self-soothe in the crib. He won't take a paci and he doesn't like it. We know its a learned behavior cuz you put him in the car seat out he goes, without even driving him around. The bugger knows you sleep in the seat. If we could only get him to do it in the crib.

The problem is his mother. He knows she's wrapped around his little finger and it breaks her heart to hear him cry. So when it comes time for him to sleep at night he'll howl for 30 minutes, screaming until he is purple; he knows she'll break. The whole while she leans over his crib singing, shhing and crying but not picking him up. One can almost see the boy's thoughts, "LIFE IS UNFAIR! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME? NO ONE LOVES ME!" And yet his mother is there sobbing tears of sorrow while he is crying knowing that the pain is temporary and it is whats best for him.

I hold my wife night after night knowing that her heart is breaking and adding to her whispers,"Daddy's here, Daddy loves you, Daddy won't let anyone hurt you." until he falls asleep. I then hold my wife and she cries herself to sleep and while I lie there in the dark I feel arms wrap around me and I hear:

"Daddy's here, Daddy loves you, Daddy won't let anyone hurt you. This is necessary but afterwards you'll be a better person My son."

I know God lives and He is the perfect parent. I know He wants all of us to be parents so that we understand His love. I also know I have a Heavenly Mother who loves me but Her heart is breaking as she watches me grow into the being I can become. Even when it hurts and I feel alone I know They are there loving me and telling me I can do it.

Thank you God for my children. I think I am beginning to understand now...










Thursday, October 1, 2009

Snow, Snow and Snow

In the move to the great white north (Logan Utah). I heard that it snows alot and gets cold. Well to my suprise it snowed on 09.30.09 and got cold...28 degrees nighttime. WTF. What have I got myself into. I'm doing my PhD in Florida. BRING ON THE HURRICANES!

also this makes me laugh
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEWgs6YQR9A

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

American Baby Mag


My wife and I have been receiving American Baby for the past six months. After the most recent issue (Septemeber 2009) I have had enough. Below the pic is a copy of the letter I sent to the editor. I hope y'all read the article and see what I mean, though unfortunately most peoplw will have to wait a month for to to show up on their website http://www.americanbaby.com/
Dear Editor,

My wife and I have been receiving your magazine for the past six months on a trial basis. We will not be subscribing to your publication due to the sexist bent of of sad publication. There seems to be an anti father/male bent to the articles. I could quote many examples but I will stick to the one that pushed us over the edge. In the article Mommy Cum Laude by Dawn Papandrea in the September 2009 issue Ms. Papandrea made the following comment "While a man doesn't hear an infant's nighttime cries, smell a dirty diaper, or see an overturned bowl of pastina, the female of the species has exquisitely honed senses. After sensing her offspring blink, she leaps out of bed. With a glance at baby's expression, she determines diaper status. And the diving catch she makes to prevent flung food from hitting the floor is worthy of a slo-mo replay."

I will properly declare my biases before attacking this statement. I am the divorced father of two boys of whom I have full custody. Before my divorce I would come home from work, typically a 10-12 hour day with a 90 minute commute, and have to change diapers (which often hadn't happened all day), wash clothes, prepare dinner, and play with my children. I did this willingly because it was both my duty as a father and a pleasure because I loved my children. My stay at home wife was so very tired she told me that it was my turn to watch the children. When she left me for another man and abandon the children (aged four and two at the time) on my doorstep six months later I did not complain but cried with joy that I would have my boys. I didn't date until my divorce was final and when I did meet my current wife I told her that if my boys didn't like her SHE would be gone. I changed diapers, arranged daycare and struggled to be both daddy and mommy as I was a single parent. It was hard but it was worth it.

My current wife and I are expecting a child due in October. It is her first and my third son. I fully plan on being the same kind of father to this one as I was to my other sons. But I am angry that I due to my gender I am negated in area. It seems to me your magazine appeals to the man hating and male excluding crowd that seeks to take fatherhood out of childhood. A child needs a father and a mother, who love and cherish her, to become a successful well adjusted adult. Hillary Clinton says it takes a village to raise a child but a village is made up of parents in loving relationships with there children ready to share the burdens. When my wife, tired from pushing out a watermelon from a hole the size lemon, hears the cries of OUR offspring it will be I, tired from work and grad school, who gets up to discover what is wrong. She will try to wake but I will tell her to sleep, when I as a male with exquisitely honed senses, will determine if my child is hungry, wet and just wants to be held. My wife has a hard job during the day helping us out. The least I can do is stumble down the hall and care for OUR offspring.

The title of your publication is American Baby, not American Mother. The emphasis should be on parents helping the baby not just one. The reality is that a lot of fathers care for and worry about their children. Motherhood does not have exclusive rights on love. I think this is something we have forgot for a very long time. I hope my words will have meaning to you and your staff. I am aware there are many crappymen in this world but some of us love and cherish our children and would do anything for them, even a slo-mo dive to catch food, but I think that's why I bought a dog.

Monday, September 7, 2009

The Presiden'ts speech to students

As an addendum to the revious post I am including a cut/paste of his speech. If he keeps to these words them this is good. A presidents job is to execute the law of the law and inspire us as citzens (yes I know its not in the constitution but there is a reason the executive branch was put into place over a single legistative branch as in the AoC). Lets hope the furor dies down after this speech is done.

Text taken from: http://www.whitehouse.gov/MediaResources/PreparedSchoolRemarks/ 09/07/09


The President: Hello everyone – how’s everybody doing today? I’m here with students at Wakefield High School in Arlington, Virginia. And we’ve got students tuning in from all across America, kindergarten through twelfth grade. I’m glad you all could join us today.
I know that for many of you, today is the first day of school. And for those of you in kindergarten, or starting middle or high school, it’s your first day in a new school, so it’s understandable if you’re a little nervous. I imagine there are some seniors out there who are feeling pretty good right now, with just one more year to go. And no matter what grade you’re in, some of you are probably wishing it were still summer, and you could’ve stayed in bed just a little longer this morning.
I know that feeling. When I was young, my family lived in Indonesia for a few years, and my mother didn’t have the money to send me where all the American kids went to school. So she decided to teach me extra lessons herself, Monday through Friday – at 4:30 in the morning.
Now I wasn’t too happy about getting up that early. A lot of times, I’d fall asleep right there at the kitchen table. But whenever I’d complain, my mother would just give me one of those looks and say, "This is no picnic for me either, buster."
So I know some of you are still adjusting to being back at school. But I’m here today because I have something important to discuss with you. I’m here because I want to talk with you about your education and what’s expected of all of you in this new school year.
Now I’ve given a lot of speeches about education. And I’ve talked a lot about responsibility.
I’ve talked about your teachers’ responsibility for inspiring you, and pushing you to learn.
I’ve talked about your parents’ responsibility for making sure you stay on track, and get your homework done, and don’t spend every waking hour in front of the TV or with that Xbox.
I’ve talked a lot about your government’s responsibility for setting high standards, supporting teachers and principals, and turning around schools that aren’t working where students aren’t getting the opportunities they deserve.
But at the end of the day, we can have the most dedicated teachers, the most supportive parents, and the best schools in the world – and none of it will matter unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities. Unless you show up to those schools; pay attention to those teachers; listen to your parents, grandparents and other adults; and put in the hard work it takes to succeed.
And that’s what I want to focus on today: the responsibility each of you has for your education. I want to start with the responsibility you have to yourself.
Every single one of you has something you’re good at. Every single one of you has something to offer. And you have a responsibility to yourself to discover what that is. That’s the opportunity an education can provide.
Maybe you could be a good writer – maybe even good enough to write a book or articles in a newspaper – but you might not know it until you write a paper for your English class. Maybe you could be an innovator or an inventor – maybe even good enough to come up with the next iPhone or a new medicine or vaccine – but you might not know it until you do a project for your science class. Maybe you could be a mayor or a Senator or a Supreme Court Justice, but you might not know that until you join student government or the debate team.
And no matter what you want to do with your life – I guarantee that you’ll need an education to do it. You want to be a doctor, or a teacher, or a police officer? You want to be a nurse or an architect, a lawyer or a member of our military? You’re going to need a good education for every single one of those careers. You can’t drop out of school and just drop into a good job. You’ve got to work for it and train for it and learn for it.
And this isn’t just important for your own life and your own future. What you make of your education will decide nothing less than the future of this country. What you’re learning in school today will determine whether we as a nation can meet our greatest challenges in the future.
You’ll need the knowledge and problem-solving skills you learn in science and math to cure diseases like cancer and AIDS, and to develop new energy technologies and protect our environment. You’ll need the insights and critical thinking skills you gain in history and social studies to fight poverty and homelessness, crime and discrimination, and make our nation more fair and more free. You’ll need the creativity and ingenuity you develop in all your classes to build new companies that will create new jobs and boost our economy.
We need every single one of you to develop your talents, skills and intellect so you can help solve our most difficult problems. If you don’t do that – if you quit on school – you’re not just quitting on yourself, you’re quitting on your country.
Now I know it’s not always easy to do well in school. I know a lot of you have challenges in your lives right now that can make it hard to focus on your schoolwork.
I get it. I know what that’s like. My father left my family when I was two years old, and I was raised by a single mother who struggled at times to pay the bills and wasn’t always able to give us things the other kids had. There were times when I missed having a father in my life. There were times when I was lonely and felt like I didn’t fit in.
So I wasn’t always as focused as I should have been. I did some things I’m not proud of, and got in more trouble than I should have. And my life could have easily taken a turn for the worse.
But I was fortunate. I got a lot of second chances and had the opportunity to go to college, and law school, and follow my dreams. My wife, our First Lady Michelle Obama, has a similar story. Neither of her parents had gone to college, and they didn’t have much. But they worked hard, and she worked hard, so that she could go to the best schools in this country.
Some of you might not have those advantages. Maybe you don’t have adults in your life who give you the support that you need. Maybe someone in your family has lost their job, and there’s not enough money to go around. Maybe you live in a neighborhood where you don’t feel safe, or have friends who are pressuring you to do things you know aren’t right.
But at the end of the day, the circumstances of your life – what you look like, where you come from, how much money you have, what you’ve got going on at home – that’s no excuse for neglecting your homework or having a bad attitude. That’s no excuse for talking back to your teacher, or cutting class, or dropping out of school. That’s no excuse for not trying.
Where you are right now doesn’t have to determine where you’ll end up. No one’s written your destiny for you. Here in America, you write your own destiny. You make your own future.
That’s what young people like you are doing every day, all across America.
Young people like Jazmin Perez, from Roma, Texas. Jazmin didn’t speak English when she first started school. Hardly anyone in her hometown went to college, and neither of her parents had gone either. But she worked hard, earned good grades, got a scholarship to Brown University, and is now in graduate school, studying public health, on her way to being Dr. Jazmin Perez.
I’m thinking about Andoni Schultz, from Los Altos, California, who’s fought brain cancer since he was three. He’s endured all sorts of treatments and surgeries, one of which affected his memory, so it took him much longer – hundreds of extra hours – to do his schoolwork. But he never fell behind, and he’s headed to college this fall.
And then there’s Shantell Steve, from my hometown of Chicago, Illinois. Even when bouncing from foster home to foster home in the toughest neighborhoods, she managed to get a job at a local health center; start a program to keep young people out of gangs; and she’s on track to graduate high school with honors and go on to college.
Jazmin, Andoni and Shantell aren’t any different from any of you. They faced challenges in their lives just like you do. But they refused to give up. They chose to take responsibility for their education and set goals for themselves. And I expect all of you to do the same.
That’s why today, I’m calling on each of you to set your own goals for your education – and to do everything you can to meet them. Your goal can be something as simple as doing all your homework, paying attention in class, or spending time each day reading a book. Maybe you’ll decide to get involved in an extracurricular activity, or volunteer in your community. Maybe you’ll decide to stand up for kids who are being teased or bullied because of who they are or how they look, because you believe, like I do, that all kids deserve a safe environment to study and learn. Maybe you’ll decide to take better care of yourself so you can be more ready to learn. And along those lines, I hope you’ll all wash your hands a lot, and stay home from school when you don’t feel well, so we can keep people from getting the flu this fall and winter.
Whatever you resolve to do, I want you to commit to it. I want you to really work at it.
I know that sometimes, you get the sense from TV that you can be rich and successful without any hard work -- that your ticket to success is through rapping or basketball or being a reality TV star, when chances are, you’re not going to be any of those things.
But the truth is, being successful is hard. You won’t love every subject you study. You won’t click with every teacher. Not every homework assignment will seem completely relevant to your life right this minute. And you won’t necessarily succeed at everything the first time you try.
That’s OK. Some of the most successful people in the world are the ones who’ve had the most failures. JK Rowling’s first Harry Potter book was rejected twelve times before it was finally published. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team, and he lost hundreds of games and missed thousands of shots during his career. But he once said, "I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
These people succeeded because they understand that you can’t let your failures define you – you have to let them teach you. You have to let them show you what to do differently next time. If you get in trouble, that doesn’t mean you’re a troublemaker, it means you need to try harder to behave. If you get a bad grade, that doesn’t mean you’re stupid, it just means you need to spend more time studying.
No one’s born being good at things, you become good at things through hard work. You’re not a varsity athlete the first time you play a new sport. You don’t hit every note the first time you sing a song. You’ve got to practice. It’s the same with your schoolwork. You might have to do a math problem a few times before you get it right, or read something a few times before you understand it, or do a few drafts of a paper before it’s good enough to hand in.
Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and to learn something new. So find an adult you trust – a parent, grandparent or teacher; a coach or counselor – and ask them to help you stay on track to meet your goals.
And even when you’re struggling, even when you’re discouraged, and you feel like other people have given up on you – don’t ever give up on yourself. Because when you give up on yourself, you give up on your country.
The story of America isn’t about people who quit when things got tough. It’s about people who kept going, who tried harder, who loved their country too much to do anything less than their best.
It’s the story of students who sat where you sit 250 years ago, and went on to wage a revolution and found this nation. Students who sat where you sit 75 years ago who overcame a Depression and won a world war; who fought for civil rights and put a man on the moon. Students who sat where you sit 20 years ago who founded Google, Twitter and Facebook and changed the way we communicate with each other.
So today, I want to ask you, what’s your contribution going to be? What problems are you going to solve? What discoveries will you make? What will a president who comes here in twenty or fifty or one hundred years say about what all of you did for this country?
Your families, your teachers, and I are doing everything we can to make sure you have the education you need to answer these questions. I’m working hard to fix up your classrooms and get you the books, equipment and computers you need to learn. But you’ve got to do your part too. So I expect you to get serious this year. I expect you to put your best effort into everything you do. I expect great things from each of you. So don’t let us down – don’t let your family or your country or yourself down. Make us all proud. I know you can do it.
Thank you, God bless you, and God bless America.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Political discourse and the decline of civility

For those who do not know I am a social and political conservative. With that disclaimer out for the world to see also let it be noted that I am disgusted with the so-called “conservative” party the Republicans. Yes I am a member of this party, which might change when I register to vote here in Cache County, and I am ashamed to be so. I am especially ashamed at the lack of morals and obvious politicking of social issues that the Republicans have done since Bush 41. Even worse is the ignoring of conservative economic principles such as the increase in federal spending, NCLB, and TARP/Stimulus bills of the past eight years.

Yes I voted for W two times, I often wonder why, and am glad I wrote in another candidate than McCain in 08. I did not, and do not support Obama however. I think he is the worst possible thing America could have at this critical junction. One thing I do think Obama has going for him is that he did win the 2008 election and until 2012 HE IS THE PRESIDENT OF ALL AMERICANS.

I’ll calm down now but it frustrates me that talk radio and conservatives who blasted liberals for saying that Bush was not “their” president are now engaged in the same behavior. There is no more political discourse; instead there is a child-like ignoring of that which a person doesn’t like.

Case in point is the Obama speech to school children starting September 8, 2009. I remember a time when people celebrated a president talking to the public. Instead, he his demonized for trying to brainwash children. I do think this is his plan, remember I think he is bad for the country but that’s another blog post, but when did we as Americans fail? When did we stop being parents to our children and allow the public sector to shape our children’s’ minds?

Political discourse and peaceful disagreement is part of our American heritage. We are not some kind of banana republic that has coups every few years. No, we allow the rule of law and civil discourse rule us. If we don’t like the way people are acting we vote them out (see 2008 and I’m willing to bet 2010). Be not allowing our children to see that there is another side and to teach them to use their brains to overcome it we are as bad as any communist regime or Terror committee.

I for one will be allowing my children to watch Obama and I will also watch his speech on www.whitehouse.gov. I will also discuss the issues he brings up with my children and listen to their views. And if they do disagree with me I will still love them. Heaven forbid they have different political views than me and think for themselves.

Its time for us to be Americans and allow for free speech and allow ALL voices to be heard, even this knucklehead we elected into office. If he is as bad as we all think he is lets let him self-destruct and get him out in’12.

Monday, August 24, 2009

First day of school

So for the past months people have told me how hard grad school is, how much work I'll be doing and how much reading I'll be doing, yada yada yada....

Today starts out with me in my GA class USU 1300: American Institutions. It was easy and I was feeling good. Last Thursday and Friday I had orientation and seminars. Between the three events I was excited and ready to start. I thought this will be easy.

Then I hit my first grad class History 6700 Folklore. HOLY CRAP! I think I have to read between 30 and 40 texts and write massively! And that's only one class. I still have two more to do.

I don't think I can ninja kick this one to the head. . .

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Financial Aid

I start my masters this month and made the big move to Logan Utah. Money is tight due to my wife not working, Gabriel due in October, and my GA money's not starting until Oct 1. I got my loans and was ready to get ready for school but there was a snag....the funds don't release until sometime during the first week of classes.

WHAT?

My problems with this are laid out below.

1. I have a professor that wants readings done before the first week of class and my book totals are $340.00
2. How do I pay for parking if I can't get my money?
2a. How do I go to class if I can't pay for parking?
3. Rent, food, internet etc., etc.

I understand they want me to start class but shouldn't they release some (25%) funds so students can live?

Where is my stimulus check Congress? I thought I was getting free education Mr. President?